Again with the Lisa Germano post titles, which seem to confuse the tourists, but I think I've figured them out.
Something my sister said, actually.
Ever been driving somewhere with two other people in the car, and you're having a conversation with the person in the passenger seat, and every few minutes the person in the back leans forward, catches a word or snippet, and then makes either a total non-sequitur statement or brings up something you've already covered five minutes ago?
They're like that. In the back seat, not really following the conversation and getting annoyed because you refuse to continually interrupt the flow bringing them up to speed.
Sucks to be them.
So at some point in every black person's life (he overgeneralized broadly), you're out with some white person -- a coworker or fellow student or something -- and encounter one of those Random Minor Racist Incidents that crop up every once in a while. Demands for multiple forms of ID, petty harassment by police or store security, some little thing that you'd normally blow off.
This is the first such incident the white person has ever seen.
They become Shocked and Offended on your behalf, which usually makes a non-situation bad or worse. They also admit that although they've heard about such things, they'd never actually believed they happened.
Which translates roughly to, "I've always thought that black people, including you, were either paranoid, delusional, liars or too stupid to realize that what they thought was racism was something else entirely."
Short version: We have never been friends.
After slapping you in the face with this, they then think they've established a Connection, instead of realizing that in fact the exact opposite has taken place.
You are expected to be polite to them at this point. They become quite resentful if you are not.
Update: Offered without comment:
- Abolishing the White Race
But don't tell me that blacks haven't had a voice and a good deal of influence. Think about Affirmative Action, hate crime laws, and Jesse Jackson. There's some influence for you.
- NOT-SO-GUILTY SOUTHERN WHITE GALS: Anne Creed sends this email in response to the post below:
I stayed on in Philadelphia after graduation to work with Turner Construction in Center City, where I had lots of opportunities to get to know Northern blacks. It feels audacious to say this, but I found that I had a much better connection with them that your basic white Yankee.
- HATING WHITEY. Have you cats, as Steve says, read this article about a nutty prof who wants to abolish the white race? I am going write a rebuttal/column in my local paper and remind the prof about the many white firefighters who died in 9-11. If any of you cats know of a similar hero, military or otherwise that I could mention, please e-mail me, or post your thoughts in musings.
Five minutes. Imagine if I was working at finding these things.
Update: Fuckit. One more:
- Apparently, there is a white Harvard professor who thinks the white race should be eradicated.
Excuse me, but racism is racism. If you call for the genocide of a race, if you make sweeping generalizations about a people, then you are a racist crank.
Reading comprehension, not a strong suit. I'm starting to regret including Rachel Lucas in there; at least she understood the article was talking about the white race as a social construct. I suppose having actually read the thing helps. . .
*gasp* I'm utterly shocked...er...nevermind.
Add them to the list. I'll supply the ammo.
Grouchily yours,
dru.
"RMRI's" (Random Minor Racist Incidents) do trigger Righteous Indignation but when the 'minor' becomes 'major' then it's a whole other story.
Link to "hating Whitey" is fucked.
I can proudly say I've not been as stupid as you describe (yet) --mainly because I haven't had to deal with that sort of situation yet.
See, Martin, the thing is. . . I usually use Linux, and get used to the middle mouse button pasting things that have been highlighted, so then when I go back to Windows and have to use CTRL-C and CTRL-V, things tend to Go Wrong.
Fixed. Not a permalink, I'm afraid, so if you really want to see the context (that's the entire entry), you'll have to make with the scrolling.
tracy, this is true. But nobody goes thermonuclear over every minor thing. Which makes it all the more annoying when you mention one in passing, and get sneering questions about "So are you gonna call Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson? Hyuck!"
dru, there isn't enough ammo, I'm afraid.
"You are expected to be polite to them at this point. They become quite resentful if you are not."
I've always gotten the sense we're supposed to be downright grateful and standing in enamored awe. Maybe that's just a west coast thing.
Laura, according to MT, that was the 2000th comment. Um. Congratulations, I think.
That's probably the way you're meant to react here in the Midwest too, but it takes so much effort for me not to Get Effnic™ that praising their insight is just out of the question.
Really been enjoying your last few posts on HUAC/black actors/black roles, btw. I've mentioned how you rawk in the past, right?
FWIW, Aaron, liberal-minded "straight but not narrow" friends do the same thing the first time they're out with you and get exposed to homophobia in action. They get their feathers all puffed up and get all excitable right about the time that you're just trying not to escalate things. It doesn't help.
On one such occasion I also got to deal with the further annoyance of my "straight but not narrow" pal discovering that the cops don't give a ripe fuck at a rolling tiara that a jeep full of frat rats threw half-empty beer cans at you while yelling "dyke" and "lezzie" and "fuckin' cunt," either.
And no amount of trying to explain to the nice straight person seems to suffice to educate them that there are some things the cops just don't get all that excited about, and your sorry queer ass getting harrassed is, from a law enforcement perspective ultimately an excercise in your sick, disgusting, probably pedophilic, diseased queer word versus that of a nice upstanding heterosexual white (male) fraternity member from a nice upstanding heterosexual white family. That is, if anyone were gonna take the time to trace a dented, wet can of Bud Light to its former owner in order to come up with that nice upstanding young man so he could give his testimony.
And I still don't talk to the stupid git who, in the aforementioned situation, insisted on calling the cops so that we could "speak truth to power" about being "violently gaybashed."
But that's more because she later said "You know, I was just trying to help. You act like you don't even WANT the help of a straight supporter!" And since I couldn't bring myself to explain it all over again and I couldn't find a convenient brick wall to pound my head into, I had to just read her beads instead.
Hanne, you get the head-pounding urge too, huh?
Well, at least your (ex-)friend, having experienced the homophobia of the establishment and the anti-straight bias of the gay & lesbian community (bet you didn't even know you were President and spokesperson), can now learnedly discuss both from her position above the fray.
There has to be a constructive way of dealing with people who aggressively Don't Get It. Other than shooting them in the face. Anybody got any suggestions?
Of course those bastards made me President. I went to the bathroom during the meeting where they were all deciding on the Gay Agenda, so they decided on that without me and then made me president too.
Fuckers. See, there's a reason I'm so spiteful.
Thanks - there will probably be more sometime soon; for some reason, seeing that play really got me back on a kick. oh, and feel free to keep telling how much I rawk. Some days I wonder.
what's that? were you guys talking about barbecue joints? there's a great one around the corner, just take a left at the light. no! left! left! i said left! oh, you weren't talking about barbecue? damn, sorry. hey, easy on the brakes! i just hit my chin with my knee!
that's the last time i hitch a ride uptown with you guys....
[;)]