Uppity-Negro.com

No, seriously. That Maxim Hair Color For Men is The Devil in bad packaging. I bought it once, only once, and my scalp still cringes in fear. Thank God for Starry Midnight, that’s all I have to say.

Ew.

Feria's the worst color I've ever had. It had all the charm and subtlety of a freshly scrubbed radioactive carrot.

That's not counting the time my college roommate turned my hair partially magenta, but you know, that was her fault, not the dye's.

Colorist, colorist, colorist, colorist.

Really.

A good one is pricey, but no color looks better than shite color. And it's more than worth the expense.

More than.

I'm done now.

Eh. I'm still annoyed my alleged grey hairs always turn out to be thread or cat fur.

I'd like to think they'll make me look more mature and distinguished, but I'll probably just look like Halle Berry in X-Men, with dreadlocks.

i like Feria. why, just last night i was just shopping for "i've just lost my mind red", but then couldn't decide between that and all the other really cool colors out there.

now, if i could find "freshly scrubbed radioactive carrot", i'd be a happier, more fulfilled person.

Aaron, as long as you don't utter the World's Most Insufferable Movie Line Ever, Halle Berry in X-Men isn't a bad way to go.

kd, freshly-scrubbed radioactive carrot isn't all that it sounds like, it's really much worse.

Heather: I've given up on dying. It's a choice between mouse-brown or frizzball of doom, even with professional color.

Ah well.

That should probably be dyeing. I wish I could give up on dying. >.

...which reminds me, I need to call my colorist right now.

I can't give up on it yet, VA. Redheads don't grey well sometimes, and I'm one. I have a couple very nice white streaks and then a headful of weird ash. When it all goes white entire, I'll stop gladly.

In the meantime, I just play the opposite card most do and have white streaks placed where mine are so that the streaks appear UNnatural rather than natural. Yes, it's silly.

And Aaron you'd look stunning no matter what happened to your head. Okay, not no matter what but....oh, you get it.

But fun. And my colorist rocks and has a great time, esp. since I may be one of the only people with real longer hair in Minneapolis, Land of Extensions.

Oh, to still have red hair naturally. We start out blond in our family, go red, and then somewhere around 22 it all turns mouse-brown.

I clung to the red for as long as I could, but with my short haircut, it looked great for a bit, and then I'd look like I perpetually had a mist of frizzy fire around my face. It sounds kinda interesting, but it's really not.

Still, I like the streaks thing, Heather. It takes well, from what I've been able to see in the pictures.

This makes me want to do something weird with my hair. I'm feeling very 'mommy' right now.

That's pretty much what happens in mine, exascerbated by being black Irish (thus, the red to brown -- though some of my mother's siblings are just pretty dark-haired period) and northern Italian (thus, the starting blonde, but having all members of that side of the family go full on grey well before 30), with a few other genes tossed in to muck up the works entirely.

Many thanks. Funky hair is fun. Okay, I'm done being girly.

Well, not really, still must make that phone call.

I don't have the Italian, just Irish, Scottish and Pollock. Must be something about the Irish genes that gives us the wacky color-change hair.

Unless someone else gets it, too. Dunno.

Welcome, anyhow.

I don't trust Maxim to copyedit its picture captions correctly, why in fuck would I trust them with hair dye?

Besides, what's wrong with Fudge Paintbox Colors?? (says the woman who has at various times gone Cherrybomb, Blueberry Hill, and a combination of Red Corvette and Black is Black...)

all my best haircolors have been accidents based on going against what any sane colorist would do. the first one was, with my hair bleached bright bright blonde, i used a temporary hair color mousse thingy called something plum. i got the loveliest shade of silvery purple, 'twas exquisite. even the stuffy accountant had to like it, it was that hot.

years later, with another big bleach job going, i tried this color called "lush cherry". well it came out almost black, but in the sunlight was an amazing deep deep burgundy cherry. oh man.

the 80's were so fun.

You clearly have not met my colorist, a woman who for years walked around with a foot-high dreadlocked pompadour of powder blue, black and white, and now currently sports extensions that make her into an exact replica of Jaclyn Smith in the Charlie's Angel years.

And she's a minivan-driving Mom, no less. Gotta love it.

Silvery purple sounds lovely. And I agree, the 80's were indeed a blast.

Has there just been an entire thread about hair color with nary a mention of manic panic? What is wrong with you people? DIY hair. It's all I have to say.

But first you have to really fuck up your follicles with the most potent, animal-killing bleach you can find.

Trust me...it'll grow back. Eventually.

Dru is right on the money there. 40 volume developer and speed bleach is the only way to really fuck your hair up.

I always liked Punky Colors better than Manic Panic though. They had a leafy green that was my main hair color for like two years. This caused the old dudes in Oakland to call me both "Sprout" and "Dennis Rodman" so it was a win/win situation.

oh, this is completely putting me in the mood for a wild hair color. i just keep thinking that at my age i should be not considering a lovely shade of neon ... something.

Speaking of dying, Aaron is not, for the record, dead.

Just locked in my closet and a little unable to speak, what with that gag and all.

But, worry not. :)

Dear Heather,

We thank you for the reassurance that our dear Aaron is, in fact, alive. However, we wish to inform you that it is SO NOT FAIR to hog the Aaron. You need to share. Meanie.

Signed,
The Aaron Hawkins fan club.

It's a big closet, love.

You could fit in there too. And I have extra gags.

Well, you could just stick a white button-down shirt on him and leave him in there with a DAT walkman instead of a gag, and see if he turns into Shinji. Then, when you let him out, make sure he runs into the penguin.

This site is FUCKED up.

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