Kill me now

Really, I'll thank you. From beyond. Somehow.

Girl power
Women are breaking out a new weapon to attract men: Flirting with each other

Men, the fantasy starts here.

As five young women in low-cut jeans and tight, flimsy tops grind their hips together on the dance floor of a hot nightclub, space clears around them and the crowd stands back, mesmerized.

At another club, the clothes come off as the hour grows late. Six women, two topless, dance provocatively together.

Fantasy has become fad as scenes like these-at Buzz and SmartBar-play out night after night in Chicago's hottest clubs.

Lesbians? Bi-curious behavior? No, this is pure performance, cultural observers say, in the same vein as the "Girls Gone Wild" videos or Madonna swapping spit with Britney at the MTV awards. More young women are dancing, touching and kissing each other in public in order to titillate men.

Call it the Flexosexual Revolution, a feminine answer to the cultural overdose of metrosexuality.

The act seems to be working.

"What's better than two feminine women doing something to please you?" asks clubgoer Steve Matthews, 33, who said women have hooked up in front of him.

I will also be torturing Steve Matthews, 33, from the afterworld. If I did it while I was alive, I'd get arrested. Yes, he says this shit, and I'd be the one to get arrested. There is no justice.

There are, however, more links where that one came from:

• Lesbians: Go for it - Young women should be free to test their sexuality, they say
• Showtime's `L Word' gets lazy, lacks zip, though why they had a guy review this is beyond. . . oh, never fucking mind.
• Attraction is emotional, not sexual

From that last one:

Female homosexuality may be grounded more in social interaction and emotional attraction and may change over time, recent studies suggest.

Young women also appear to be more open to homosexual relationships than young men are. In one recent national study, more than twice as many girls as boys reported being attracted to the same sex at least once.

Girls may be reacting, in part, to relationships gone sour with guys.

"Girls understand how girls think," says Chanda Harris, a high school junior near Washington, D.C. "You can tell a girl, 'I think I'm falling in love with you,' and she'll listen. A boy will slough that off, or run away. Besides, the young boys around me are into making money, selling weed and stuff. That's not what I'm about."

Translation: All she needs is to meet the right. . .

Yep. Something quick and fairly painless, if you don't mind.

Update: Cross-posted to Chicago Lesbians Invading Taverns, where there's a very interesting comment on The 'L' Word, including this tidbit:

and if you don't have showtime, you can watch it at stargaze or t's lounge this sunday night jan 18 9pm - no cover!

I shouldn't. I really, really shouldn't. . .