Aaron really enjoyed that episode, so it's kind of fitting that this "Once More, with Feeling" Sing-A-Long will be premiering on Friday night. Friday would have been Aaron's 37th birthday!

So I'll be there at the Music Box Theatre at midnight (and maybe Saturday night, too; I haven't decided). It's definitely something to sing about :>!

The thing I hate most is how this changed my identity, how I'm now that girl that used to have a brother, that girl that doesn't have a brother anymore. And Karen and Mom both still feel that too, feel that way pretty chiefly. No one ever tells you about that part. It's just not who you want to be.

But blah blah blah, enough about me. How's everybody else doing? Drop a comment here or write to me directly.

Meanwhile, Aaron lives! The parent of a friend donated money in Aaron's name to the Homewood Library. The librarian overseeing the donation read the entire Uppity-Negro blog--bless her heart!--and decided upon two books for the collection in Aaron's memory. So if you ever go to the Homewood Library, you'll see the bookplate, "In Memory of Aaron Hawkins," in these two books:

The Coldest Winter Ever by Sister Souljah
Birth of a Nation: A Comic Novel by Aaron McGruder, Reginald Hudlin, and Kyle Baker

There was actually a brief ceremony at the Homewood Library when these books were added to the collection--but we missed it (!) because we never got the letter from the Homewood Library telling us about it, agh! The only reason we found out anything is because I happened to spot the article in the newsletter (see below). We gasped first, of course, and then called the library and found out the whole story. And then we went to the library and saw the bookplate in Birth of a Nation: A Comic Novel--which is really an absolutely perfect addition, as some people confused Aaron with McGruder anyway, thanks to the same name and similar... sensibilities, shall we say--? Thank you, Homewood Library and librarians--and thank you, Mrs. S., for the donation!

See page four of the four-page Fall 2005 issue of the Homewood Library Novel News newsletter (as an Adobe Reader PDF file) at:
http://www.homewoodlibrary.org/nn2005fa.pdf
(excerpt)

HONARARIUMS AND MEMORIALS
THE PERFECT GIFT

Have you ever worried about finding that special gift to fit an important occasion such as an anniversary, birth or
bereavement? A donation made to the Library not only honors those you wish to remember, but also can be shared by the entire community. Books or other materials selected for commemorative gifts receive a book plate with suitable inscription. The honoree or family is invited to come in and view the item. If you would like to give a gift that will be used as well as appreciated, please consider a donation to the Library. Donations of any size are welcome. The librarians will be happy to discuss your ideas with you.

Recent Honorariums and Memorials:

In Memory of Aaron Hawkins
The Coldest Winter Ever by Sister Souljah
Birth of a Nation: A Comic Novel by Aaron McGruder, Reginald Hudlin, and Kyle Baker

Still, Nipsey was probably best-known, by kids of the 1970s and 1980s anyway, for playing the Tin Man in the film version of "The Wiz" -- which, in keeping with the character, was probably one of the most heartfelt performances put on film. His dialogue included the subject line above.

Keep laughing and keep living!

And so we stop to say "Thank You." Thank you for the cards, the letters, the phone calls, the e-mails, the flowers, the words of encouragement, the food, the prayers, and your continuing support. At the memorial service, it was a comfort to us as friends shared stories and remembrances from Aaron’s life. Please keep us in your prayers and Aaron in your memory as we go forward.

"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away." Revelation 21:4

Well, to begin with, Aaron Hawkins (1970-2004) created this blog and web site, Uppity-Negro.com, in 2000. Before that, in 1998, he created the Stone Cold Jane Austen web site, which originally was published via Earthlink, but has been moved here to Uppity-Negro.com intact -- along with the infamous El Gecko!

Above is one of the last pictures taken of Aaron (courtesy of TranceJen) before he died on September 3, 2004. Aaron... desperately hoped the next world held better hopes and dreams for him, and he didn't want to wait any longer to find out if it did -- who among us hasn't felt at one time or another that he no longer has anything to offer this world? As with most other truly brilliant men, his genius was a double-edged sword; the sharp intellect that powered his lively and often shredding wit also nursed a deep and, unbeknownst to us, growing despair within him about his life, a feeling that we'd all assumed was long behind him. We were wrong. Aaron's death was confirmed for us on September 8, 2004.

But Aaron was wrong, too. The pain experienced by our family was absolutely immeasurable, as you would expect. It will never die. But what we couldn't have known, and I don't think Aaron could have possibly guessed or would have even believed, was how his death would affect the so-called "blogosphere" as well. I expected that Aaron's friends who had blogs and, conversely, the blogs of those he considered friends, whether he'd actually physically met them or not, would express grief at his passing. But having one of the oldest blogs on the Internet, combined with having one of the oldest blogs by a Negro/black/African American, combined still more with his having one of the longest blogrolls known to man (and I exaggerate here only slightly!) caused his death to have a ripple effect all over the world (and I exaggerate here not at all). I still thought I knew the size of the grief when Red Herring contacted us, but I was completely floored by the other media outlets who contacted us, including the Chicago Sun-Times. I had my own selfish reasons for wishing Aaron was still here--I loved him, he loved me, he was my brother and best friend--but it was becoming clear that there were hundreds (thousands?) of people who felt the same way, whether they'd personally known him or not. Could a man whose death caused so much sorrow for so many people really be someone who no longer had anything to offer this world?

Aaron touched the lives of so many people, a gift he took for granted. It's kind of like in the movie, It's A Wonderful Life. Like Jimmy Stewart's George had no idea, I think Aaron was likewise unaware of how special that really is and how special he really was. As difficult as getting over my own initial shock and grief have been, it's also been wrenching to hear from old friends and classmates of Aaron's, who had lost touch with him, but, for whatever reason, found themselves thinking of him, blithely did a Google search on his name, and were delivered here, and find out for the first time the stunning news of his death. Very real tears have been shed for this man in all these months after his death and I know that there will be still more. He just wasn't a forgettable person!

Mostly, I consider myself blessed to have known him at all.

P.S. Find out more about Aaron at the September 25, 2004 entry, Message from Jessie, Aaron's Mother.

Also, see Aaron's unofficial FAQ from his December 20, 2003 entry, A.I.: His hate is real. But he is not.

And, see the "thank you" letter that appeared in the October 1, 2004 Chicago Sun-Times:

In appreciation

Thank you for the wonderful article ["Fans flood Internet with grief at blogger's death," news story, Sept. 17] regarding my son, Aaron Hawkins. We have been amazed at the impact Aaron's blog and his death has had on the Internet. We cannot begin to express our gratitude to his many readers for the expressions of love and support we have received since his death. I only hope that he knew how much he was loved and respected and how much we all miss him. Again, thank you for the wonderful article. We will continue his blog, uppity-negro.com, as a tribute to him.

Jessie Cunningham,

Homewood

I just found out about Aaron having been among the first month's posters to Blogcritics.org -- well, via Eric Olsen anyway! -- which is celebrating three years and 10,000,000 unique visitors. When will I stop being surprised at learning these things??

A story my grandfather, an aspiring author, liked to tell was that if only he'd gone to DuSable High School, he would likely have met recently deceased Black publishing pioneer John H. Johnson and eventually become a great and famous writer for the Johnson Publishing Company here in Chicago. But no, instead he went to that other area high school, where he met the love of his life, Merteree, whom he married years later and with whom he had three sons, and from whom only death parted, in a marriage that lasted over four decades.

Darn the luck!

The above subject line was a joke -- a joke! -- from Aaron McGruder (pictured above), creator of the daily comic strip, Boondocks, which premieres as an animated TV show for Cartoon Network's Adult Swim on October 2. Check out Riley below!

McGruder presented a clip of the show, along with the main cast of voice actors--including veteran actress Regina King, who voices both Huey and Riley, as well as John Witherspoon, who's perfect for voicing Granddad--at the San Diego Comic-Con, before going on to the Television Critics Association (TCA) summer press tour the following week.

By far the biggest stir at the TCA summer tour was caused by Chris Rock for his upcoming UPN series, Everybody Hates Chris, so much so that the question became that the show is too good for UPN and shouldn't it be moved to CBS--?! An African American show too good for the U People's Network? Now that's ironic!

Speaking of African Americans on TV, cool lil' sis Karen made a memorable appearance on the local ABC News affiliate last week, talking about blogs -- although she didn't get to mention Uppity-Negro.com. In the story, she's specifically speaking about some crazy comments that she got on the blog she kept while she was overseas earlier this year for an international newspaper internship. Read the (kinda sketchy) transcript below, which is from the ABC News web site:

Entering the Blogosphere
By Alan Krashesky

[NOTE FROM VAL: This transcript contains errors which I went through and corrected.]

July 19, 2005 - Most parents may not have a clue, but millions of teenagers are now posting their personal lives for anyone to see. They are using a new online form of publishing called "blogging," which gives virtually anyone a voice to the world.

Blog is short for the word "weblog." An estimated 8 million people across the country blog online everyday. Still, most people don't know who bloggers are. Many are ordinary people who post their opinions on political issues and news events, but now that the blogosphere is especially popular with teens, the craze comes with some concerns.

Welcome to the blogosphere. Just do a Web search and you can spot the bloggers. Many are teens who post their personal details, stories, favorite songs online. Think of it as an interactive teen diary, although not a secret one. It's for all to see.

"I can write things, and people can comment back to you. It's kind of like e-mail only more personal," said Karina Anglada, teen blogger.

Sixteen-year-old Chicagoan Karina Anglada lists her daily life events on her blog, complete with pictures.

Danny Gutman takes his love for sports from the tennis court to the blogs.

"I get to tell people about how I am thinking creatively and tell them about my interests and what I like to do, while I also get to read about their blogs and see their interests," said Danny Gutman, teen blogger.

About 21 million teens use the Internet. One recent study found that about one out of every five of them has a blog.

"Blogging is a phenomenon and is one that is particularly attractive to young people because it gives them several benefits," said Peter Zollo, Teenage Research Unlimited.

Those benefits include creativity and self expression, says Zollo. He runs a research firm that studies teenagers.

But Zollo and other experts also warn teens not to fill blogs with wild stories and provocative pictures.

"Because I realize that 10 to 15 years from now, if I am applying for a job, my future possible boss could put my name into Google and see I put something I shouldn't have on the Internet," said Gutman, teen blogger.

Experts also warn of online predators. Blogging teens should not use last names or exact locations, and they should never meet strangers in person.

Karen Hawkins wants to warn teens about her recent bad blogging experience.

"I was very vulnerable, very exposed. Anyone who knew anything about the place where I worked knew who I was," said Hawkins.

With her personal details made public, Hawkins says threatening people posted insults and racial slurs about her because they did not like the content on her blog. Nothing happened but she sure was frightened.

"Be careful about how many personal details you reveal about yourself. Don't say 'I'm a junior with blonde hair who goes to New Trier,' " Hawkins said.
[NOTE FROM VAL: Corrected spelling from "New Treir."]

Teens are not the only blogging trendsetters. Many bloggers are adults using sites to talk about the latest news or even to cover news and political events. It's a new way to get information, but you need to now that when you read someone's blog, they may not be objective.

"We definitely have an opinion, and you can care to agree or disagree with that. We'll say what we think, and a lot of times, the news, they have to filter that out," said Chicagoist editor and founder Rachelle Bowden.

Chicagoist's staff of young professionals all work in the Loop. During the day they work in jobs like public relations and web design, and in their off-time they run Chicagoist, a news blog.

"We can let everyone know what we are thinking at the same time. If our readers don't agree with us, they are happy to let us know about it," said Andrew Peerless, Chicagoist.

Nationwide, news bloggers have gained the attention of politicians who now watch bloggers carefully.

One example came just last month when bloggers, along with Jewish and Republican groups, became outraged over comments made by Senator Dick Durbin. Durbin compared the alleged treatment of prisoners at Guantanamo Bay to Nazi Atrocities and genocide. A week later he apologized.

"My guess is, if you are a savvy politician or perspective politician, you are keeping an eye on the bloggers," said Steve Jones, UIC communications professor.

Such is the blogosphere, serious business for some, while others are flying along, just enjoying the ride.

"If you want to go visit your friend's site you just type in their name and there it pops up," said Katrina Hawkins.
[NOTE FROM VAL: Actually, the news story ends with Karina Anglada again. There's no one named Katrina Hawkins in the story--! Told you it was sketchy...!]

Whether juicy details on blogs will come back to haunt teens remains to be seen. Experts say that while teens should be cautious, many people may just consider blog entries as teenagers having fun.
[NOTE FROM VAL: Eliminated the repeated "that" in the sentence.]

And now I go on into the Las Vegas heat... right here in Chicago! Everybody take care and keep blogging!

Anyway, I didn't know the story had been printed and posted online, but over a month ago, I spoke with John Boudreau of the San Jose Mercury News, via e-mail and telephone, and our lengthy, detailed conversations resulted in--two small paragraphs toward the end of the story?!? What-ever!

Seriously, though, the story spoke to this new digital information age, where so much of your life is "lived" online, and what happens to all that information after you die--? Should you name a kind of "virtual executor" to be caretaker of your blogs and web sites? And then what about any of your other accounts, including financial records and e-mail mailboxes; if the worst happens, is there a way your survivors could access these accounts, if desired or necessary? Naturally, this is an issue that was brought up in the case of the November 13, 2004 death of Lance Cpl. Justin Ellsworth in Iraq, and his surviving family's rebuffed initial attempts to access Ellsworth's Yahoo! e-mail account, later resolved in the family's favor in court:

John Ellsworth's attorney, Brian Dailey, said Yahoo acted appropriately in handling Ellsworth's request for his son's e-mail. "Their policy tracked the law completely," he said. "If they had released the e-mails before the court order, they could have gotten into trouble."

While the process may be cumbersome for families, it's the best way to safeguard against abuses, said Brian Smith, chief technology officer of Hushmail.com, a British Columbia-based Internet service provider that offers encrypted e-mail.

"If you start allowing exceptions, security could be compromised," he said. "The easiest way to hack a system is through social engineering -- you get on the phone and you lie until someone believes you."

Smith's company will not release information to third parties unless they have a legal order issued by a British Columbia court.

Still, sometimes family members can circumvent such procedures if they know the deceased's passwords or can guess them.

That's what Valerie Hawkins of Chicago did. Her brother, Aaron Hawkins, died in September. She was able to access his e-mail accounts by figuring out the answers to his "forgot password" hints. She and her family also decided to keep his blog up and running.

She reviewed his financial dealings, but deliberately avoided personal e-mail. "It was important to just get a handle on his accounts to see what it was he had so we knew whom we had to contact," she said.

Obtaining the digital property can be more than an act of financial housekeeping. In some cases, a Web address might even have trademark or some other financial value, said estate lawyer Litherland.

But, he added, "for most of us, passing away will mean our digital existence passes away, too."

The story was picked up and has appeared in various newspapers all over the country... but doesn't look to have appeared in any newspaper here in Chicago! That wacky Chi-town media!

Take care of yourselves and each other.

But it's not all thorns I'm offering you, bud. You only need to have your eyes opened. Please, don't say anything else to anyone until you read Eric Schlosser's Reefer Madness: Sex, Drugs, and Cheap Labor in the American Black Market, which does an excellent job of laying out the situation of your people over here. And here's a clue, you may want to ask somebody in the USA what the term "sharecropping" means, and listen to a little ditty that mentions St. Peter. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Actually, though, I think Spike Lee said it best.

WAKE UP!

One of the things you learned watching the Buffy the Vampire Slayer TV show (and yes, you did learn something!) was this:

Good consequences, bad consequences, indifferent consequences, it don't make no never mind; there are always CONSEQUENCES. The problem with Alicia Hardin was that she was so focused on getting her planned results that she forgot about the consequences. Even now, in claiming her confession to police was false, she is still indulging in some mean self-denial that she can still escape the consequences of her plan and still get the results she'd wanted.

Get better, Alicia. Fast.

It's actions like hers that have me considering completely off the wall things... like bestowing a FOOL Award. Inspired by Chicago Sun-Times Richard Roeper's GOOF (Greatly Overexposed Overhyped Fool), a FOOL would be for a Foolish Obnoxious Outrageous Lunkhead!

Ehhh, I'm still working out the kinks...

But now, on to the catching up!

And don't forget those silly, silly names. Even if he didn't flaunt his devotion to pimping and pit bulls, you'd probably guess Snoop Dogg is a rapper. And Fedlawyerguy—yeah, probably a blogger. But the "blogger or rapper?" parlor game can stump even the nerdiest gangsta. Does uggabugga hate on wack emcees or wack Charles Krauthammer? What about Mad Kane? Big Noyd, Justus League, Uppity Negro, Little Brother, Cold Fury, and South Knox Bubba? (Answers: blogger, blogger, rapper, rap group, blogger, rap group, blogger, blogger.)

I know it wasn't a slam, and I'm not necessarily slamming him, but the story is... You know those nights when you're sitting around, alone or with friends, and you've been up way too late, and you've probably been drinking way too much, and (pop!) allofasudden you're struck by this thought, this idea, this concept, and youhavetowriteitdownrightnow, because it's so bloody brilliant, it EXPLAINS IT ALL! And you scribble it down in a fever and, when finished, collapse in a fit of intellectual exhaustion!

And then you wake up the next morning, all in excited glee to view it sober, and you do read it and you find it's the most ridiculous shite you've ever concocted and you really need to lay off all that damn peppermint schnapps at 3 am?!

Kinda like that.

But he'd already turned it in. And it'd been accepted. And it wasn't bad. It did make a reasonably valid comparison. But... it does have a faint yet discernible scent of peppermint schnapps.

But what do I know? Why, I'll bet Adam Curry loved the story's last line, where Levin joked that "maybe that podcasting thing won't be totally useless after all."

Anyway, Uppity-Negro.com and Aaron received a far more serious honor and rare distinction from the Perranoski Prizes:

One of the chief reasons I was motivated to do the Perranoski Prizes at all arose from the death of a fellow blogger who I wanted to find a proper way to honor, Aaron Hawkins of uppity negro. Not only was he one of the earliest blogs to rise in popularity to a celebrity status, but Aaron was genuinely - online and off - a nice and good-hearted man. In this world, too often, ‘nice’ and ‘good’ carry a sense of quaintness, of old-fashioned virtues quickly acknowledged and then dismissed as kind of square. There was nothing dismissable or quaint about Aaron. There is nothing easily accepted in losing his presence or his pleasance.

If I’d launched this endeavor and he hadn’t been nominated, I’d never consider taking this past this year. As it turned out, he was nominated and was one of the three Hall of Fame entrants for 2004.

I hope the folks at Wampum will consider taking on this category in the future. And here or there, I think we should broaden the name of the award to the Aaron Hawkins Hall of Fame Award.

Read more about the Perranoski Prizes, which "are named after Ron Perranowski, who was the best relief pitcher for the Dodgers during the Koufax era," which you'll see represented in the graphic of the award itself:

As I mentioned on the new Uppity-Negro.com Founders Page, Aaron touched the lives of so many people--and even with this, I think I still underestimate the breadth of his influence.

I was honored to be asked by Giles but ultimately had to decline representing Uppity-Negro.com in the Blogging While Black panel at this year's South By Southwest Interactive Festival. I can imagine that Aaron would have been most colorful (yes, I really said that!) at the panel, contributing any number of experiences encountered in maintaining this blog. He told me about a lot of it, but certainly not all of it. And even if I'd known more, I'd have only been able to relate second-hand stories--which every American court defines as hearsay. I haven't seen any front line action (unless deleting at least 300 trackback & comment spam messages every time I log in to this blog counts!), and I think it would have been unfair to pretend that I had. Giles did pass on an audio file of the panel, so I felt like I was there in a way. And Aaron was mentioned, which was very cool! As I told Giles, I especially enjoyed his explaining that after reading Uppity-Negro.com and Gunn that he "wanted to be a Negro, too!"

2nd gratuitous Adam Curry mention: SXSW Interactive had a panel on podcasting but did not, I repeat, did NOT ask Mr. Curry to participate. Huh??

These CEOs, man, to be that ruthless, you're a scary dude. I tell ya, now I walk past a little gangbanger, I don't even flinch. But if I see a white dude with a Wall Street Journal, I haul ass. Before I walk past the Arthur Anderson building, I'm cuttin' through the projects. Cutting through the projects, you might just lose what you have on you that day. I ain't never been mugged of my future.
-- Wanda Sykes, Tongue Untied DVD, Yeah, I Said It book

I got the opportunity to see the documentary, Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room, a kind of movie adaptation of the book, Smartest Guys in the Room: The Amazing Rise and Scandalous Fall of Enron, by Bethany McLean and Peter Elkind. Actor Peter Coyote narrates.

I would highly recommend this documenrary if you want to truly understand just how brutally greedy this company and its employees were and how it was able to bleed California dry (to the delight and for the entertainment of some of its traders), resulting in the election of the "governator." You get to see staff meeting and staff training videotapes, hear phone calls, watch snippets of the federal hearings. It's a fairly complete as well as maddening story. Along with the TV movie adaptation of Brian Cuver's book, "The Crooked E: The Unshredded Truth About Enron," that starred Angel veteran Christian Kane, and the two columns, Joe Bob Explains Enron and Joe Bob Sings Enron, I've gotten a pretty full picture not only of the scandal itself and how it happened, but also why it happened--it really was uniquely American success run amuck!

My only quibble, if you can call it that, with the film were the choices made in the dramatizing of some parts of the Enron story. Vice Chairman J. Clifford Baxter's suicide is shown with what actually looks like a gun shot going off in a parked car. Enron Energy Services head Liu Pai's strip clubs visits put the viewer right in the middle of a topless lap dance by an anonymous blond performer (in case you thought it might be a good idea to take the kids as a kind of moral/educational admonishment of having bad business ethics). These choices do make the story more cinematic... if also nearly as graphic as a governator movie!

You can see Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room at the Landmark Theatres in Chicago.

OK, this is me, Val, signing off... y'know, so I can delete more of the spam!

It was an intimate gathering of relatives and friends--including Faith, who helped us set up and blow up balloons!--at Women and Children First Bookstore (W&CF) on January 16th, 2005, organized by both kid sister extraordinaire Karen and Mom. Yet another thank you to W&CF for being so gracious as to let us use their space to remember Aaron. I think he would have especially approved of the standup photo of Buffy that oversaw the gathering :>! We gave her a balloon to hold while we all drank coffee and ate Chicago's own Matt's chocolate chip cookies. Plus, we were pleasantly surprised by a lovely bouquet of flowers from another Chicago's own, the Thousand Waves Martial Arts and Self-Defense Center.

We shared some letters from friends who couldn't be there and I read one of Aaron's first "blog" entries ever, the library anecdote of his Saturday, April 24, 1999 entry at his Stone Cold Jane Austen site--which I duly prefaced with an apologetic disclaimer to any Minnesotans in the audience!

In the background was a CD I made of some of Aaron's favorite songs and artists, including the song from Aaron's December 05, 2003 Choose your destiny entry. Naturally there was also Mindy Smith's Come to Jesus and Shakira's Ojos Asi.

Karen talked about she and Aaron meeting Neil Gaiman completely by chance a few years ago (which Aaron mentions offhandedly in the comments for this entry), and she also brought along an old McDade school newsletter she found in a box in her latest move, which both announced Aaron joining WBEZ and doing skits with other Chicago schoolkids on Saturday mornings (I most remember a skit Aaron did where he played a kid addicted to television, and he had this line, "Go on, Don Pardo, tell him what he won!"), and which also had part one of a story he'd written. We don't have part two--but then, I'm not sure McDade put out another newsletter that year and had part two--!

It was fun, and we missed those who couldn't make it, but perhaps we'll do it all again next year. Thanks to everyone who attended, who were there in person or only in spirit.

And by the way, a HUGE THANK YOU to everybody who attended the memorial, whether in person or in spirit. It was lovely -- plus there was a standup photo of Buffy! I'm sure Aaron would've approved!